Lonely girl

Been having a hard time with friendships lately. I feel like the friends I have had for years just don't want to hang out or really BE my friends anymore, but don't want to hurt my feelings so they just don't call, or text, or anything really, save for the occasional FB msg on a picture of Lola or something. And so I see they go places and do things with their other friends but I'm never invited... So it's like I'm being unfriended without actually being "unfriended". 

I came to this realization when, the other day, I wanted to call someone to talk. And I had no one. I have my mom and that's great, but no one person, other than my mom, really knows anything about me or my life anymore. I used to be able to call this person or that and they would know what and who I was talking about. They would have whatever history/back story was needed to understand my thoughts/fears/etc. Now? Now I have no one. No one knows if Nick and I argued about this or that to understand why something he did/didn't do would bother me (just an example). No one knows me well enough anymore to know that I do/do not worry about my mom/grandmother/etc. No one actually KNOWS me anymore. And it feels like those that claim to know me really just don't care. 

Now, you can try to turn this around on me, but you'd be wrong bc I have made the calls, sent the texts, sent pms on FB in an attempt to maintain us... But it hasn't. You could say I didn't try hard enough, and there you may be right. But they don't seem to have tried at all. 

Adulthood is lonely. I have my family and they are wonderful, but I miss having friends.